May 19, 2008

Home Again Home Again Jiggety Jig! And a CT Call.

I'm back--I had a fantabulistic time at the zoo with John and Alex....don't worry tons of photos! And tons of catching up with all y'all to do. It was a tough day today. This would have been graduation day for Nicole. We drove in from Omaha hoping we wouldn't run into the parties, but the neighbor boy was having his party today rather than yesterday. So....I stayed inside as much as possible, trying unsuccessfully to forget about the mess before us.

I've always been upfront with you about not wanting to blog much about Niki's personal life, because it isn't my story to tell, really. But I think it's okay to share she's taken off again, nearly three weeks ago. And left her online courses incomplete. It's so hard to make sense out of what doesn't make sense at all....and she is apparently engaged now. Something apparently some of the family knew about, but we (John and I) were left in the dark. I'm still working on this 'let me try to be your daughter's friend' game people play. It stuns me when I hear about it. As if they would be able to do what we clearly were not able to.

Only John and I know the truth, that we were good parents and our daughter is a good girl....who isn't where she needs to be right now. This will only come with time and by the amazing graces of God, who can absolutely set this right, and I know He will...I just need to let it be in His time. Sadly, we very much like her boyfriend and we would have been thrilled about this...after she finished school. She would have been done after summer school and then we would have supported her completely.

Anyway, that's the down low, and in part that's why I've been a little detached lately. Alex suffers the most, he breaks down out of the blue sometimes.

Alright, enough negative, I know this will all be okay one day, don't feel sorry for me, just pray with me, that's all. AND if you're a digi scrapper, one of the stores I'm in is looking for a CT member. If you're looking for access to some very cool designs and if you're wanting to find a laid back, no hassles CT to be involved with, this is there place to go! Just let me know you're interested, I'll shoot you all the details asap.

Here's an example of a primo kit you'd be working with (how cool are the fuzzy die I ask you?):



18 Comments:

Donna. W said...

We're in the middle of moving (about 600 feet away) and I unearthed some old diaries. I got all bogged down in 1993 and actually got depressed reading about it. What a traumatic year it was! My daughter was at loose ends back then, although I had so much other drama going on, I probably couldn't devote too much time to worrying about her! You're right, God will get you through it all and it'll turn out fine. Did you ever hear this song? "God will make a way where there seems to be no way; He works in ways we cannot see. He will make a way for me. He will be my guide, hold me closely to His side with love and strength for each new day. God will make a way, He will make a way."

Anonymous said...

Sending you many hugs and wishes for peace and strength.

Anonymous said...

I knew something was up. I knew it. I wish I could say something to make it better. I just hope you know that people are sending you their thoughts and prayers. Love you.

Queen of Arbitrary Randomness said...

My dear Stacey, my heart aches for you and for Alex. I probably understand your situation from his point of view better than any.
Nearly 10 years ago my one and only younger sister took a severely independent streak. My parents and I were idiots in her mind and we knew nothing. We painfully let go. God has been working this whole time, even though we couldn't always see it. Anytime she needed us we were there, regardless of how we would be treated. Wounds are starting to heal and brains are beginning to function properly. I think in the end we will be stronger for what we have endured. You are in my prayers each and every day, as well as John, Cody, Alex and Nicole.
Please don't hesitate to call on me any time you need anything.
"God will make this trial a blessing, even though it brings me to my knees."

Memarie Lane said...

My parents had a really hard time with my sister. She got pregnant at 16, she practised witchcraft, she ran away so constantly that the police stopped coming when we called...

But the worst part of the whole thing for my parents was that instead of supporting them, all of their friends were eager to point out everything they must have done wrong. And they did nothing wrong, believe me.

Jim and Jami said...

I will be praying with you.....Cool, love the tag, I will try to submit something.....

Happy Elf Mom (Christine) said...

Oh, Stacey. My heart just hurts for you. I'm sorry.

Cat said...

Thinking of you & praying for you.
Guard your heart at this time.

Cate x

Shana said...

Stacey, you are, as always, in my prayers. (((HUGS)))

Mom Knows Everything said...

Hugs and prayers my friend! My father used to have a saying, "God never gives you anything you can not handle." It's helped me through some rough times, I hope it helps you too.

D... said...

Dang. My heart hurts for you. I wish my magic wand wasn't broken right now. I'll pray hard instead.

{{{hugs}}} and love to you, John, Cody, and especially, Alex & Niki.

StarSraps said...

Wow Stacey! We have so much in common. I have my own 17 yr old, who I love dearly, however, I had to move her out of my home for the second time in February. The first time, I thought I might die, I prayed and prayed that God would bring her home & he did 6 months later. Just to show me that it's not time. I have some peace now, and we are talking...barely. I know, that I know, that someday that light will come on for her & I will no longer be the enemy, but until then, my Father loves me into happiness, regardless of my circumstance! Big Prayers for you & yours! Love You!!

Unknown said...

Stacey, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for the emotional ride you're being taken on and I will hope and pray and pray some more that it's over for you soon. I pray that life can be back to "normal" and that she can get her life figured out by the grace of God...

xoxo

Val

Jillie Bean (AKA Bubba's Sis) said...

Oh, Stacey, sweetie - I'm so sorry! You know I know what you are going thru, and my heart aches for you right now. I am - as always - praying for you, and for your whole family. God has a plan for Niki - I know He does. Hang in there, honey. And I'm here if you need me.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry to hear about Niki. It's so hard to be a parent sometimes. You raise them the best you can and hope that things turn out okay. My prayers are with you and your family.

Jenny86753oh9 said...

So I feel like a schmuck. I've been sick in bed and didn't read this. You know I knew...but not about the latest. Maybe I'll just call ya...


(btw - what are ya doing begging me to be your CT...I AM your CT already. Girl I always have your back...well, unless I'm puking and dying in bed, then I'm just further behind you.)

Anonymous said...

Sending love, love and more love. You are a wonderful mother. You are in my hearts and prayers. I've been behind on my blog reading, but I am always here if you need me. I feel your sorrow. It is so hard to put it in Gods hands, but we must. It is the only way. Plus, you raised her well, in the long run, you will see that.

XOXOXO

Misty DawnS said...

Stacey - I'm SO sorry I missed this! You ARE a FANTASTIC mother! You are an inspiration to me on many levels. She will come around. ((((((HUGS)))))) I luv u!